Sam Nicholson was a second-half substitute against Livingston two weeks ago. Coming on in West Lothian for the final 20 minutes of the match, he helped the team record a 2-0 win away from home.
But that appearance was something that meant an awful lot to him. For Sam, it was his first minutes in 350 days. During that prolonged injury layoff, a lot had happened. The birth of his second child, the doubt of whether he’d ever lace his boots up again, countless setbacks and the disappointment of letting his child down when he wanted to play football as his father struggled to move due to constant agony.
A testing time that was an emotional rollercoaster from start to finish has ended with the forward coming back from his setback. When asked how he would summarise the last 12-18 months, he struggled.
“I actually don’t know what to say,” Sam Nicholson laughed.
“This might sound a bit deep, but I would say in a word, the last 350 days have been painful because for at least eight months of that, my knee was actually so sore the whole time. It was just difficult, to be fair, because I’d think I was getting somewhere with my knee, and then something would happen.
“I got to a point where I was like, ‘I don’t think this is ever going to get fixed. Now I’m over that, I’m buzzing.”
Nicholson’s last appearance came against Ross County on the 15th February 2025, prior to that Livingston match. He missed the start of the 2024/25 season through injury and recovered in December. Playing ten matches, three of which were starts, he never did feel quite right when on the pitch.
The injury sustained in pre-season was still lingering over him, and with the benefit of hindsight, he can now say that the root of the problem began in the summer of 2024.
“Even in those matches last season, my knee was knackered,” he stated.
“I was on loan here and then signed permanently. I went away for pre-season, and my knee just started hurting. It was tough to be in constant pain for that length of time because I felt bad for my son quite a lot. I’d come back home having spent a day trying to get better, and he’d be asking if we could have a kickabout in the garden or go and do something together.
“It killed me to have to say that I just couldn’t. Not because I didn’t want to, but just physically, I couldn’t. I did actually think at one point this is going to be one of those injuries where you just might have to deal with playing football in pain and just get on with it. But thankfully now, I don’t feel anything.
“All I’ve got now are aches and pains from getting back up to speed, but that’s just my body getting back into playing football again. Touch wood it stays like that now.”
The journey back to full recovery wasn’t straight-forward for Nicholson. Thinking he had made progress, he had to deal with further setbacks. And it was the hope that was killing him the most during the spell on the sidelines.
“I would say that was the worst part if I’m honest,” Nicholson added.
“It’s when you get your hopes up for something. I’m not the only one who’s had a bad injury. Zach [Robinson] has been through it, Filip [Stuparevic] has been through it, and even Callum [Slattery] went through it. When you’re injured, you’re constantly feeling down. I was on a downer, and then I got that sort of feeling that I was coming back up and being happy, and then to have that taken away is tough.
“I can remember thinking, like, ‘I don’t know if I can be bothered to go through all this again.’ Which sounds weird because I went from being positive to negative, but it was a constant shift in mentality. I’m better for it now, is what I will say. I can remember I was trying to get myself fit for pre-season at the start of this season, and I was running during the off-season; I was in Fir Park every day.
“I just remember being in pain every day, and I just thought as long as I can get away for pre-season and be involved with the squad, I’d be right chuffed. But the reality was I was nowhere near ready for that. I had to stay here whilst all the boys were away, and I could see on our group chat that they were having fun, and it was brutal to see. That was the point where I started to become really down about things again.
“It’s emotional because you’re up and you’re down when you’re out. Some days you’re in a good mood because you’ve completed a programme and you feel good, and then the next day you can take a bad reaction to it. It’s difficult, but it’s part of football.”
Being on the sidelines just watching is tough. But Nicholson was also concerned about his future career at Motherwell and what lay ahead. With new manager Jens Berthel Askou in the building and constructing an exciting system and group of players at the club, Nicholson grew concerned that he wouldn’t be in the manager’s plans.
“I’m out of contract at the end of the year as well, so I was thinking that I need to get back at some point and at least try to catch the eye of the manager in some shape or form,” he explained.
“I still need to do that. Just because I’ve come off the bench doesn’t mean anything really. The squad changes, and different people become available; some people might be better suited for certain games. So I need to try and keep working away. When you’re injured, it’s rough alone, but watching the boys this year has actually helped me because it’s motivation because you’re watching them play such good stuff whilst enjoying themselves.
“I really want that. Whereas normally you can be watching your team get beat and can get annoyed, but I’m watching these games this season, and I’m just in awe. Sitting there worried, going, “I’ll never get in this team; they’re all doing so well! It’s been such a positive watching the boys.”
Another major flashpoint in Nicholson’s recovery was a trip to London. The trip down South was to visit a consultant regarding his options. This decision would help him know what the timelines looked like.
But the potential outcome was heartbreaking for him.
“I went down to London, and they said we’re going to do this surgery,” he stated.
“But they said if it didn’t work and you’re still in pain, then you’ll have to either play through the pain, which I knew I couldn’t do as I was in agony, or hang the boots up. I can remember phoning my dad and just being blown away by this prospect. I didn’t know what to do.
“I felt sorry because I went down there with Jack, who is one of our physios, and I don’t think I actually spoke to him for the full day. Jack and David Henderson have been unbelievably good with me, and I owe so much thanks to them for getting me back to where I am. But in that moment, I couldn’t speak to Jack. I was feeling angry, sad and lost all at the same time.
“I was on a proper downer for the rest of the day, and I felt so bad for Jack because he was sitting there paying for my coffees because I just kept ordering them, and he just paid for them. What a man he is. But that was tough to hear. Some people have been through that kind of thing, like, it’s not just me. Callum Slattery was there at one stage getting awful news, and look at him now.
“Things can change, and I just hope the same thing can happen to me.”
But, through hard work, endeavour, professional advice and successful surgery, Nicholson began to get fitter and stronger. With no further setbacks, he set his sights on first getting reintroduced to training. Having spent so long missing out, some may think that he would slowly reintegrate himself and err on the side of caution.
No. That wasn’t his way.
“My first training session and I was just running about,” he laughed.
“Because I was at the point where I was like, ‘Right, this is surely it now. If it’s not sorted, then I am going to need to call it a day. So my mindset was I am going to give it my all, and that’s what I’ll be doing for the rest of the season. I’m employed by Motherwell, who have stood by me during all this. That’s the reality.
“I found out that I was going to be in the squad for the Livingston game on the Friday. I’d been training ok, and I’d been working hard to get to the point I was at, but I wanted to get in that first squad again. I thought I may have to wait because it’s Livingston and it’s on the astroturf. They might not put it in.
“But in terms of testing out my knee, I suppose there’s no greater test than playing on the AstroTurf, so I was buzzing. I didn’t think I was going to get as long as I did on the pitch. I thought I may get ten minutes, but apart from the misplaced passes, I was buzzing. Plus, I actually played a ball through Tawanda, and I fell over. Not my best look. We were doing video analysis on the game, and they cut it at the bit where I took a tumble; it looks so bad. But still worth it.
“The best feeling was getting the shout from Graeme Henderson that I was coming on. He was pointing at me to come over, but I was standing next to Jordan McGhee, and I nudged Jordan to tell him he’s going on. But Graeme kept pointing, and I was looking up the line, thinking he’s not talking about me. But then he actually came up to me and just went, ‘You!’
“I duly obliged. It was amazing stepping onto the pitch again. I don’t want people to think that the Livingston game was about me because it was about the boys winning a tough match, and they were excellent. But I felt like I’d worked hard, not only in the gym but also mentally, to actually get that reward. After the game was lovely, to the point I’d say it was really emotional.
“I hadn’t been in a situation for so long where we’d won a game and you were clapping the fans, which was pretty cool. The boys got round me, giving me cuddles and high-fives. They asked me to give a speech in the dressing room after, but I would have burst out in tears, to be honest. It sounds soft, but I was on the edge.
“There was so much emotion because of how long it had been, and there was so much that came with it. Would I play again? Will I ever be pain-free? But to get playing again just felt like I’d overcome all of that. Plus, I kept passing the ball to the Livingston players, which didn’t help. But no seriously, just an incredible day all round.”
What lies ahead for Sam Nicholson, nobody can predict. But in his head, he is now fully focused on being in the squad and contributing to the team’s success for the remainder of the campaign.
From watching in the stands, he feels like the system could be good for him.
“It’s just about getting minutes now and seeing where the season will take us,” Nicholson said.
“Right now as a team, we just focus on each game as it comes. If I can contribute, then that would be great for the team and myself. I just need to get that match sharpness and fitness back, which will come over time. The more minutes I get, the better I’ll feel. It might be gradual, and it might take longer than I expect or want, and I may even miss out on squads going forward.
“But I just need to soldier on and get through it. There’s lots of football still to be played and a lot still to be achieved by the team, I think, so I’m looking forward to being involved in that.”
